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Passive vs. reflective thinking: How much do we actually know about ourselves?

Most people think passively – they react to the world according to automatic patterns they acquired in childhood. Passive thinking accepts reality as it is, without questioning. In contrast, reflective thinking asks questions: Why? How? What if? It's a way to look at a situation from a new perspective and open the path to deeper self-understanding.

Již mnoho let ve mně rezonuje otázka pasivního a reflektivního přemýšlení. Většina lidí funguje v rovině pasivního myšlení – na základě předsudků, výchovy a převzatých myšlenkových vzorců z dětství. Často na sezeních slýchám věty jako:

„To je normální.“

„Dělají to všichni.“

„Tohle přeci chlapi dělají.“

„To je typické ženské chování.“

„To dělají všechny děti.“

„Ten můj syn chce dělat práci, která není normální…“

A mohla bych pokračovat donekonečna. Tohle nejsou skutečné myšlenky – to jsou automatické odpovědi na realitu, kterou si sami neověřujeme. Reagujeme na svět tak, jak jsme se to kdysi naučili. Většina lidí netuší, kolik jejich denních rozhodnutí a reakcí není vůbec jejich.

Nedávno jsem měla rozhovor s učitelem:

Zeptala jsem se učitele: „Proč považujete dítě, které v klidu sedí během celé hodiny, za hodné a chytré, zatímco dítě, které vyrušuje, za zlobivé a hloupé?“

Učitel se na mě podívá s nechápavým výrazem. „To je přece jasné! Dítě, které poslouchá, se učí a chová se správně. To druhé kazí hodinu.“

A tady se dostáváme ke klíčové otázce: Odkud se bere tohle přesvědčení?

Když se na chvíli zastavíme a podíváme se na situaci reflektivně, začne se objevovat jiný pohled:

  • Možná to dítě, které „vyrušuje“, potřebuje jiný styl výuky – něco více dynamického, co mu umožní zapojit se jinak než jen sezením v lavici.
  • Možná to dítě, které mlčí a „poslouchá“, ve skutečnosti neposlouchá vůbec, jen se naučilo být neviditelné, protože ví, že když bude potichu, nikdo si ho nevšimne a nebude ho obtěžovat otázkami.
  • Možná by místo „To je normální!“ stálo za to položit si otázku: „Co kdyby to šlo i jinak?“

A tohle jsou přesně ty momenty, kdy se ukazuje rozdíl mezi pasivním a reflektivním myšlením. Pasivní myšlení přijímá realitu, jak je podaná. Reflektivní myšlení se ptá: Proč? Jak? Co kdyby?

Není jednoduché změnit pohled na věc, protože to znamená přiznat si, že se můžeme mýlit. A to je nepříjemné. Někdy je jednodušší držet se starého pohledu než si připustit, že bychom mohli věci vnímat jinak. Když se učitel zamyslí nad tím, zda se děti chovají určitým způsobem kvůli němu samotnému, naráží na obrovské zrcadlo. A to se většině lidí nelíbí. Proto tolik lpíme na starých vzorcích. Ne proto, že by byly správné, ale protože nám dávají pocit jistoty.

Ale co kdybychom se na chvíli podívali na své vlastní myšlenkové vzorce? Co kdybychom začali zkoumat, proč věříme tomu, čemu věříme?

Je smutné, že mnoho lidí tráví jen velmi málo času zkoumáním vlastních myšlenkových procesů. Přitom člověku během dne hlavou proběhne v průměru 6 200 myšlenek (výzkum Queen ‘s University, 2020). Kolik z nich se ale věnuje tomu, jak přemýšlíme?

Lidé přemýšlejí málokdy o tom, jak jejich mysl vlastně funguje. A přitom právě tohle je klíčem ke změně.

Zkuste se dnes zamyslet nad tím, jak přemýšlíte. Každý den si položte třeba jen jednu z těchto otázek:

Jak jsem dnes reagoval/a na situaci, která mě rozčílila?

Proč mě něco tak malého dokázalo vytočit?

Odkud vlastně pochází mé přesvědčení o této situaci?

Co kdybych si na to podíval/a úplně jinak?

A sledujte, co se začne dít. Možná se poprvé podíváte na některé věci očima, které nejsou zatížené minulostí. Možná poprvé zjistíte, kolik věcí přijímáme automaticky, aniž bychom si je, kdy ověřili. Možná poprvé pocítíte, jaké to je, když si dovolíme na svět podívat novýma očima.

Otázka tedy nezní „Jaký je svět?“, ale „Jaký je svět, když se na něj podívám novým pohledem?“

A na tuhle otázku si musíme odpovědět každý sám.

Sources:

Výzkum o denním počtu myšlenek: Queen’s University, 2020 (https://www.queensu.ca/gazette/stories/counting-our-thoughts-new-research)

Teorie reflektivního myšlení: Dewey, J. (1910). How We Think. Boston: D.C. Heath & Co.

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Frequently Asked Questions

Welcome to the Frequently Asked Questions section! Here I have gathered answers to the most common questions about my online products and services. If you cannot find the information you are looking for here, do not hesitate to contact me at coach@martinaocadlikova.cz I am here for you!

Coaching is a process that supports individuals in achieving their personal and professional goals. I help you discover your potential, overcome obstacles and find your own solutions and strategies.

Coaching takes place through regular meetings (in person, online or by phone) during which we focus on your goals, challenges and steps to achieve them. I ask questions, listen and provide feedback to support you in the process of self-reflection and growth.

You can expect a safe and supportive environment in which to express yourself openly. Each coaching session is individual, focused on your needs and goals. We meet regularly, either in person, online or over the phone, and work together to achieve what you want. During the session, I guide you to self-reflection and finding your own solutions. I will help you set and achieve clear goals, develop your strengths and find new ways to overcome obstacles.

The length of the coaching process varies according to individual needs and goals. Some goals can be achieved within a few weeks or months, while others may require a longer collaboration.

Sessions are usually held once a week or once every two weeks, depending on needs and agreement. Regularity and consistency are key to achieving optimal results.

Yes, coaching is completely confidential. Everything you share during the session stays between us. Respect for privacy and confidentiality is a fundamental principle of my coaching practice.

Coaching focuses on the present and the future, helping you achieve your goals and develop your potential. Therapy often deals with healing past traumas and mental issues. Coaching does not solve mental illness and does not replace therapeutic care.

The first session is about getting to know each other. We will talk about your goals, challenges and expectations for coaching. You don't need to prepare in particular, just be open and honest.

The price depends on the length and frequency of the session. I offer a variety of options that may better suit your needs and budget. For specific information, please click here

My coaching style is empathetic and supportive. I believe in authenticity and open communication.

Yes, I offer both in-person and online sessions.

Coaching results vary according to individual goals and commitments. Many of my clients report improved self-esteem, achievement of personal and professional goals, better work-life balance, and overall increased satisfaction.

I use different methods and tools according to the client's needs, including powerful questions, visualizations, mindfulness techniques and action plans. My goal is to find the most suitable approach for you.

I understand that life can be unpredictable. Please let me know as soon as possible if you need to cancel or reschedule a session. I try to be flexible and find a new date that works for you.

Together, we will monitor your progress through regular recaps and evaluation of goals achieved. We will also work on self-reflection and evaluating what works best for you. I use tools like journals, self-reflection exercises, and measuring key indicators so you can see how you're moving forward.

Yes, in addition to individual coaching, I also offer group coaching and workshops focused on various aspects of personal and professional development. Keep an eye on my site for updates on upcoming events.

I am an accredited coach with a comprehensive background that includes over 130 certifications in various coaching and personal development areas. I hold an MBA in Coaching and Mentoring Leadership, and an MSc in Project Management. My academic journey also includes a CertHE in Child Psychology, and I am currently continuing my studies at the British University of Psychology and Counseling.

I am currently preparing for the PCC certification (ICF), which will allow me to provide even deeper and more structured coaching conversations in accordance with international standards. My approach to working with clients is practical and focused on profound inner transformation. In the coaching process, I combine psychology, mental coaching, and strategic thinking to help clients better understand themselves, overcome internal limitations, and find an authentic direction in their careers, relationships, and personal lives.

I firmly believe that real change comes from within—through understanding one's own values and beliefs. My goal is to support clients in developing their inner strength, enabling them to make conscious decisions and act in alignment with their true selves.
Jsem přesvědčena, že skutečná změna vychází zevnitř, z porozumění vlastním hodnotám a přesvědčením. Mým cílem je podporovat klienty při rozvoji jejich vnitřní síly, která jim umožní přijímat vědomá rozhodnutí a jednat v souladu se svým pravým já.

I work with a diverse group of clients, including individuals, professionals, entrepreneurs and companies. My approach is tailored to each client and their specific needs and goals.

You can tackle a wide range of topics including career development, personal growth, work-life balance, improving relationships, boosting self-confidence and many more. Together we will determine what you want to focus on.

I will suggest that you find a suitable professional. Coaching does not replace therapy, but can be a supplement to therapeutic care.

I work flexibly to meet the needs of my clients, but never at the expense of my principles and family. I offer sessions at various times during the day, including evening hours.

I believe that open and constructive feedback is the key to successful coaching. I encourage you to provide me with continuous feedback so that we can tailor our sessions to your needs and expectations.

For online sessions, I use secure platforms such as Zoom, Skype or Google Meet. Before your first online session, I will provide you with all the information you need to connect easily.

I understand the importance of finding the right coach and I appreciate your interest. I do not offer free initial consultations because I invest all my time and energy in my work and I value my time. Instead, I provide you with all the necessary information on this page so that you can get to know me as best as possible and see if I am the one for you.

If you have any questions or need more information, please do not hesitate to contact me. I'm here to help you make the right decision.

I believe that setting clear, specific and achievable goals is the key to success. Together we will identify your main goals and create a plan to achieve them. This process involves breaking down big goals into smaller, manageable steps.

It is common for goals to evolve over the course of coaching. I am flexible and ready to adapt to changes in your priorities and goals. Together, we will regularly review and adjust your plan as needed.

In addition to regular sessions, I offer support via email or short phone consultations if you have questions or need additional support between sessions. I am here to support you every step of the way.

Yes, in addition to individual coaching, I also work with teams and organizations that want to improve collaboration, communication and efficiency. I offer team coaching, workshops and training tailored to the specific needs of your organization.

I believe that work-life balance is critical to long-term success and satisfaction. I help clients identify and achieve this balance so they can be productive and happy in all areas of their lives.

My personal values include authenticity, empathy, trust and integrity. These values underpin my coaching approach and influence every aspect of my work with clients. I believe that when we are true to ourselves and act with integrity, we achieve the best results.

Absolutely, I am always open to new clients. If you know someone who could benefit from coaching, I would be happy if you could refer me. Your recommendation is a great appreciation for me.

After completing the coaching process, you should have a clearer idea of your goals, more confidence, better habits and concrete strategies to overcome challenges. My goal is for you to feel equipped with the tools and skills needed for long-term success.

Yes, one-off sessions are a great way to maintain continuity and get support when you need it most. We can arrange one-off consultations according to your needs.

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